The Wrestling News Experience: 06.17.13

Monday, June 17th, 2013

From 411Mania’s Canadian offices in Kitchener, Ontario, Canada, this is The Wrestling News Experience, with Stephen Randle!

Who Is The Weakest Link?

Good morning, everyone, and welcome to the Experience. I am Stephen Randle, now at basically full typing capacity. I know, you were all worried, but I’m fine. You can resume your daily lives now.

The real question is, if my finger is fine, why is this opening monologue so short?

Wade Barrett © vs The Miz vs Curtis Axel – Triple Threat Match – Intercontinental Championship

JBL tells us not to include any asterisks when discussing Axel’s win streak, because wrestling doesn’t do asterisks! Also, the announce team can’t really pronounce “asterisks”. It’s a common problem, actually.

Apparently Paul Heyman’s last four clients have all become World Champion. I must have missed that Heidenreich title run. Although I suppose he gets partial credit for Bully Ray.

Sign in crowd: Newfoundland loves Cena. I suppose you’d only understand why that’s hilarious if you’re Canadian, but trust me, it’s funny.

The crowd is getting into the finish, but possibly only because they’re worried Axel might not win.

Well, that was inventive.

Curtis Axel defeated Wade Barrett and The Miz to win the WWE Intercontinental Championship (pinfall, covered Barrett while he was trapped in the Figure-Four Leglock)

Man, how pissed must Fandango be for suffering the world’s worst-timed concussion (from his point of view)? Not that any concussion is particularly well-timed, of course. Ahem.

I think the best part of the HHH-Axel staredown is that Trip is a couple inches shorter than Axel and clearly strained upwards to try and get in his face.

Kaitlyn © vs AJ Lee – WWE Divas Championship

Lawler bon mot: “I think all women really despise each other”. Well, so much for the female demo.

And now they’re trading divorce jokes. You know what, I take it back. Let the good Divas stay on NXT where these jokers don’t do commentary.

AJ Lee defeated Kaitlyn to win the WWE Divas Championship (submission, Black Widow)

Well., they tried to do a sympathetic bit there at the end with Kaitlyn crying and Layla coming out to comfort here, but Chicago is the wrong place for that. Years of dealing with the Cubs have hardened their hearts.

Oh good, a mid-PPV analysis panel of Josh Matthews, Big Show, R-Truth, and Cody Rhodes. And you thought the NFL on Fox panel was terrible.

Speaking of things that aren’t terrible, I hear the Wyatt Family is coming. I hope this means Hawaiian shirts and straw hats will be making a comeback as well, because I’ve been waiting.

Dean Ambrose © vs Kane – WWE United States Championship

Oh Lord, they really don’t have anyone else to challenge for the US Title until Kofi comes back, do they.

Dean Ambrose defeated Kane to retain the WWE United States Championship (COR)

RVD?

Wait, what?

Okay, so they clearly must have put a huge loophole in the Wellness testing.

Cue the return of the “one shot deal” jokes!

In a replay of the pre-show match that nobody (including myself) saw, Sheamus defeated Damien Sandow. I’m as shocked as you are.

Dolph Ziggler © vs Alberto Del Rio – World Heavyweight Championship

I do like how they manage to recap the Ziggler title win and following weeks without once mentioning the words “Jack Swagger”.

Hey, how do you tastefully tell a guy that his roots are showing? Come on, Ziggler, you remember what happened the last time you went brunette?

I sense we may not get a great match as they (understandably) slow down the pace to protect Ziggler a bit in his return.

Interesting that they’ve reversed the flow here, Del Rio is controlling the pace and action while Ziggler sells. Usually, the heel controls and the face sells, but it does serve to highlight Ziggler’s concussion.

Man, if Del Rio starts wrestling any more like a heel, he’s going to start doing that stupid wink again.

Seriously, are they trying to do a double turn here?

Wait, what the…fuck?

Alberto Del Rio defeated Dolph Ziggler to win the World Heavyweight Championship (pinfall, enziguri)

Well, that throws some of what I wrote down below all to hell, doesn’t it?

I mean, that had to be a double turn, right? That’s the only way that makes sense. Of course, that puts AJ in an odd situation, since she just won the Divas title as a heel. Well, she’s crazy, so maybe it won’t matter.

I’m not against this if they actually are turning both Del Rio and Ziggler. As hot as Del Rio started as a face, and as boring as he was as a heel, his heat has cooled so far that they had to try something to shake things up. Besides, the crowd really wants to cheer Ziggler anyway because he’s cool, and his entire selling-based ringwork works better as a face.

Um, okay, they sent Del Rio back out to cut a promo along the lines of the old Kurt Angle “I deserve this because I’m awesome and I totally did this for you…and also me” bits. Yeah, that’s a heel turn. I wonder if they were waiting on crowd reaction and decided to cement it right away.

CM Punk vs Chris Jericho

The pre-match promo video seems to paint Jericho as the heel in all this. I mean, it is Chicago, so he will be, but still. Is everybody turning tonight or something?

Well, Punk, you’re certainly rocking the Wolverine look there. Maybe they’ll ask you to host the Oscars next year.

I feel like they’re playing up the idea that Punk might have lost a step after taking on Undertaker. Or maybe I’m reading too much into what I want to see happen.

Did he just yell “Blackhawks in Seven”?

Well, if Punk’s finishing sequence wasn’t the end, then I say cue the screwjob!

Or we could just beat the shit out of Jericho and hit a double-rebounding GTS. That’s good too.

Still, Heyman’s got to be a little worried…

CM Punk defeated Chris Jericho (pinfall, GTSx2)

The Shield © vs Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton

Man, they rushed that heat segment into Orton’s hot tag. Just no build, the crowd didn’t have time to get behind it. Or maybe they really don’t like Orton, because they just went absolutely silent for his segment, it was like somebody flipped a switch.

Seriously, who killed the crowd?

Man, this attempt at a heat segment on Orton just is dying a quick death. The crowd only reacted just before the tag to Bryan, presumably because they realized he was going to get back in the match.

Oh no, we’re going with “wacky face miscommunication” as impetus for a turn! I hate wacky face miscommunication! Even regular face miscommunication I’m not real fond of! Heel miscommunication I’m indifferent to. Why, yes, I am rambling, thanks for noticing.

The Shield defeated Daniel Bryan and Randy Orton to retain the WWE Tag Team Championship (Rollins pinned Bryan, Black Out)

All right, so we’re taking the third option. Of course they did, it was the one that required the least amount of effort.

I suppose you’ll have to read on to figure out what I mean.

John Cena © vs Ryback – 3 Stages of Hell Match – WWE Championship

Wow, look at all those guys employed by WWE that they do absolutely nothing with. Hey, Ted DiBiase gets what has to be his first PPV appearance paycheck in over a year!

Yep, WWE just booked a spot where the mighty power of John Cena managed to flatten thirty Superstars in one move. Anyone shocked?

Well, that was an interesting but anti-climactic finish to the first fall.

Ryback pinned John Cena in a Lumberjack Match. Ryback leads 1-0.

Oh, right, now the odds are really, really, really stacked against him, having to win two straight falls. I forgot about that part.

Methinks this second fall will not be a long segment, since they apparently only have one table. You know, first they cut the pyro, now the pre-cut pasteboard table budget. If this keeps up, they’ll only be able to afford to have JBL’s hat as the colour commentator.

That hat will still do a better job than Michael Cole.

Oops. Well, I guess there’s always the SAT.

I will give Ryback this. He makes those steel steps look far more dangerous by driving them through tables and tossing them effortlessly than Cena pretending to strain to lift them ever did.

My previous jokes are no longer relevant as they’re on the third table at this point, but I’m keeping them in anyway because screw it, they were funny in the moment.

John Cena defeated Ryback in a Tables Match. Tied 1-1.

Way to completely not sell that table bump that happened a minute ago, Ryback.

Who gave this thing so much time? There’s still twenty minutes left on the PPV!

Are you kidding me? We worried about the “official” start of an Ambulance Match? Man, they’re paying attention to the nitpickiest of rules lately.

And Ryback breaks an ambulance window with his hand. Yeah, that’ll stop the Goldberg comparisons.

Boy, this must be thrilling for the people in attendance who have to try and watch stuff happening on the other side of the ambulance.

Yep, here’s the build to that big spot at the end I predicted. I’ve got money on collapsing ambulance roof. Because copying WCW’s ideas is the route to pure profit!

Damn, I love being right all the time.

John Cena defeated Ryback in an Ambulance Match to win 3 Stages of Hell 2-1 and retain the WWE Championship

Three title changes and potentially two double turns (although I suspect Jericho won’t be heel past tonight), so technically a lot of stuff happened, but if you were tuning in to watch the kickoff of Daniel Bryan’s singles run, well, I guess you’re still waiting. Punk-Jericho was Match of the Night, but probably will not be getting any votes come MOTY time, if you catch my drift.

Well, if nothing else, stuff happened.

Last night, John Cena blah blah blah overcame the odds blah blah blah still WWE Champion. Who will now challenge John Cena? Seriously, I have no idea, there really isn’t anyone immediately set up to face him.

Meanwhile, we have a new World Heavyweight Champion, as Alberto Del Rio regularly used Dolph Ziggler’s recent concussion to his advantage and walked away with the gold. But in the process, did Del Rio go too far in order to win the title? He would say “No, of course not. Don’t be silly”, but will the fans agree, especially in light of watching Ziggler attempt to fight back despite clearly being in tremendous pain?

Also, CM Punk made his return at Payback, and while it was rough going, he did emerge victorious in his hometown, clearly somewhere near the same level he was when he disappeared into the night following WrestleMania. Where did he go, and why? Maybe we’ll find out tonight!

And following his Intercontinental title win last night, Curtis Axel ran into Triple H backstage. However, when Vince attempted to set up a match between the two for tonight, the WWE COO said he “wasn’t feeling it”. What kind of game is…er…The Game playing now?

Plus, Mark Henry returns, and that means problems for somebody. Whomever that might be, we shall find out tonight, on Raw!

I think we can all agree that WWE has a chance to grab onto a big opportunity in the form of Daniel Bryan. So, before Payback got underway (just thought I’d bold this statement for some reason), I decided to take a look at every potential option WWE could go with in the finish for the Orton/Bryan vs Shield match. Well, not every potential option. I mean, it’s unlikely that Dread Lord Cthulu will rise from the depths mid-match, devouring all reality in the process, but the potential is always there. Anyway, these are the three most likely results.

Randy Orton Turns

The easiest option, and the one I, and it seems many people, want to see happen. The unfortunate part is that a) Orton already semi-turned on Smackdown last week and they basically passed it off as “Randy being Randy” and b) while reasons can always be made up post-turn, the storyline as written doesn’t seem to indicate an Orton heel turn. Although with Bryan getting the decision in the six-man on Smackdown this Friday, they can make a case that he’s at peace with the whole “weak link” thing, only for the dastardly Orton to turn on him, and state that he did so to prove that Bryan truly is weak…or at least, weaker than him.

So, let’s look at what happens to certain people coming out of this situation:

Daniel Bryan – Bryan has the crowd in his hands as is, and the sympathy heat from an Orton turn and ensuing feud would probably be off the charts. Bryan has the ability to be an absolute, white-hot, top flight babyface, which is something WWE is sorely, sorely lacking right now.

Randy Orton – Orton needs a change in the worst way, because the last year and a half had been a total waste of time for him. He’s been involved in no truly meaningful feuds for a long time, and while the lack of direction hasn’t hurt his heat, it has meant that one segment every show has featured a main event guy wasting time for no real purpose, and that translates to boring TV. While there’s no guarantee that a heel turn will instantly translate into better stories out of Creative, doing nothing would be far worse.

John Cena/Dolph Ziggler – The WWE and World Champions, respectively, one of whom would likely be in Bryan’s sights after any feud with Orton. Cena is the rumour, because WWE continues to badly misread who their own fanbase thinks is a face and who is not, but either way, the top champions in WWE currently have this issue where they don’t actually have anyone credible to challenge them for PPV feuds going forward. Cena won the WWE Title at WrestleMania and was immediately faced with a slate of opponents so empty that Ryback was forced to turn heel to kill time for a couple of PPVs and give WWE time to, at worst, find somebody, anybody, that would give Cena a good matchup in time for SummerSlam. Meanwhile, Ziggler’s first real World title reign suffered, not just because of his concussion, but because his main two challengers were Jack Swagger, whose rocket push was ill-received by fans and whose own screw-ups have probably cost him any chance at another legitimate shot in the future, and Alberto Del Rio, whose initially hot face turn has noticeably cooled, again, mostly due to WWE failing to capture any sort of crowd reaction by pairing him against the xenophobic Swagger. In both cases, a PPV match with Daniel Bryan would give them a hot feud, at least one or two incredible matches, and probably make up some lost momentum. The only issue is, as with CM Punk, John Cena would more than likely be getting those dreaded “mixed reactions”, not exactly the best plan for the guy whose supposed to be your top face.

POST-PAYBACK EDIT: I suppose we could insert “Del Rio” wherever I said “Ziggler”, but mostly I’m a little disappointed we might have lost our chance at a Ziggler-Bryan series for the immediate future

CM Punk – Common scuttlebutt has always been that Punk prefers heeling it up, which is no real surprise, and a Bryan face push would probably allow him to continue walking the dark path a while longer. Word is that Punk’s return is for him to be the headliner of the second house show tour while Cena runs the first one, but I’d imagine he can do that as either face or heel. Plus, if Punk stays heel, we’d almost inevitably run into another series of Punk-Bryan matches, and I can’t think of anyone who couldn’t live with that.

Ryback – Putting Bryan against Cena will allow Ryback to slip back into the midcard where he can make up for having spent most of the last eight months losing PPV matches and continue to refine what is actually turning into a decent heel character, now that he’s cutting less paint-by-numbers promos

Wade Barrett, Damien Sandow, Antonio Cesaro, Curtis Axel, Cody Rhodes, 3MB… – Well, at least they won’t have to be resigned to sooner or later running into Orton and losing decisively multiple times, in feuds, on TV, and on PPV. Although I guess Sheamus is still around, too…

Daniel Bryan Turns

A clearly less-preferred result, but the one rumoured to be favoured by WWE, likely because they have a faint hope that if they put a heel Bryan against Cena (in Philly) that Cena won’t get boo’d. Good luck with that. Anyway, in this scenario, Bryan almost definitely goes on to face Cena (because there’s no way they’ll go heel-heel for the World title), possibly at Money in the Bank, maybe they hold off for SummerSlam, so that Cena can have that five-star match at a big show (even if MITB has become, to some people, a better/more important PPV). Plus, with Rock likely not back for SummerSlam (and a potential Brock-Rock rematch), it’ll be on Cena to sell PPV buys, so they’ll have to have a high-caliber main event and if they can’t promise big names, they’ll have to go with a great match.

Of course, after that, unless they’re actually planning to put Bryan over Cena for the WWE Title, he becomes just another heel on a roster that has a lot of them, many in a better position than him, with a crowd that’s probably going to be dying to cheer him anyway. Literally, Bryan is in an Eddie Guerrero situation, where a heel turn would basically be ignored by the fanbase anyway, since he’s just too darned entertaining to boo. If WWE is dead-set on this idea, they may be forced to change their mind quickly, hopefully before they bleed off too much of Bryan’s heat in what would be, in my opinion, a waste of time.

Although if Bryan turns and Punk comes back a face, we could still get more Punk-Bryan. Man, now I don’t know what I want.

Nobody Turns

Well, then we wait for one of the first two scenarios to happen tonight on Raw, or in the build for Money in the Bank, or at Money in the Bank (Hopefully by then at the latest, because there’s a definite risk in waiting too long).Mark my words, one of Orton or Bryan is turning. Nothing else makes sense. I mean, how dumb can WWE Creative be?

Wait, don’t answer that. It’ll only make me sad.

Hey, they can’t all be ridiculously long and detailed explanations. After all, brevity is the soul of…something.

– Word is that Stephanie McMahon might have sold off a big chunk of her common stock. Well, of course she did. She’s back on TV, so that can only mean one thing: new boobs!

– I actually had nothing else for this section, but the boob joke was too good to pass up.

1. CM Punk Other things occurred, but Payback was all about the fans wanting to see CM Punk. The signs were for him, the shirts were for him, even the end of the opening video was a shot of him. It was only two months, but damn, it’s good to have him back.

2. Daniel Bryan Bryan ends up on the short end on Sunday, but he is the guy who ended The Shield’s undefeated streak as a three-man team, and that ain’t not bad. I suspect if there hadn’t been so many other heel-face alignment shifts potentially going on last night, we might have actually seen his story with Orton progress, but alas, now we wait.

3. AJ Styles In a BFG Series full of luminaries like Joseph Park, Hernandez, Jay Bradley, Mr Anderson, and Bad Influence (hey, I like ‘em, but they ain’t winning), AJ becomes a favourite to win in the initial bracket. Of course, ask James Storm how that worked out for him.

4. RVD Interesting to promote his return a month from now with a video at the PPV, but it did manage to hype me up a little. Quick, enjoy the moment before remembering that he’s way past his prime and basically sleep-walked his way through his final months of TNA!

5. Alberto Del Rio Well, I don’t know what they’re going for, but you wouldn’t think they’d go to the lengths they did last night without some kind of plan, right?

6. Curtis Axel When you get your shot, no matter how you get it, you have to take advantage, and Axel rides a lucky break in the form of Fandango’s concussion into his first singles title win. Hopefully the belt gives him better luck than it did for Wade Barrett.

7. The Shield They lost their winning streak, but remain US and Tag Team Champions after Payback. The streak had to end sometime, and it went to a good cause, but meanwhile, they’re the strongest-booked champions not named John Cena on the roster. I know, low bar, but still.

8. The Wyatt Family Not sure how I can continue to give them credit for running the same video, but dammit, that’s exactly what I’m going to do.

9. AJ Lee I’m not sure which I liked more, aggressive crazy wrestling AJ, or totally crestfallen AJ after Ziggler lost the title. The good news is, they’re the same person (well, they’re in the same body, anyway), so I don’t have to choose!

10. Bo Dallas Okay, I screwed up last week. But nobody noticed except a 411 writer, so I don’t have to apologize. Suckers! No comeuppance! Bo Dallas sucks, by the way.

Inactive List as of 06.09.13

WWE

– Booker T, out indefinitely as of June 7th (elbow surgery)
– Christian, out indefinitely as of September 1st, 2012 (elbow)
– CM Punk, out indefinitely as of April 8th (R&R)
– Evan Bourne, out indefinitely as of March 19th, 2012 (foot)
– Hunico, out indefinitely as of November 1st, 2012 (ACL)
– Jack Swagger, out 2-3 months as of June 5th (hand)
– Kofi Kingston, out 1-2 months as of May 30th (elbow)
– Mark Henry, out indefinitely as of May 20th (shoulder)
– Tyson Kidd, out 4-6 months as of January 10th (knee)

TNA

– Jeff Hardy, day-to-day as of June 6th (hip)
– Madison Rayne, out indefinitely as of March 17th (pregnancy)
– Zema Ion, out indefinitely as of May 17th (appendectomy)

Transactions

– CM Punk, WWE, returned to action on June 16th

– Fandango, WWE, day-to-day as of June 10th (concussion)

WWE Champion: John Cena
– 71 day reign, defeated The Rock on April 7th (WrestleMania XXIX)

**NEW** World Heavyweight Champion: Alberto Del Rio
– 1 day reign, defeated Dolph Ziggler on June 17th (Payback PPV)

**NEW** WWE Intercontinental Champion: Curtis Axel
– 1 day reign, defeated former champion Wade Barrett and The Miz in a Triple Threat Match on June 16th (Payback PPV)

WWE United States Champion: Dean Ambrose
– 29 day reign, defeated Kofi Kingston on May 19th (Extreme Rules PPV)

WWE Tag Team Champions: Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns
– 29 day reign, defeated Kane and Daniel Bryan on May 19th (Extreme Rules PPV)

**NEW** WWE Divas’ Champion: AJ Lee
– 1 day reign, defeated AJ Lee on June 16th (Payback PPV)

**NEW** WWE NXT Champion: Bo Dallas
– 5 day reign, defeated Big E Langston on June 5th (NXT)

WWE NXT Tag Team Champions: The Wyatt Family
– 40 day reign, defeated Adrian Neville and Bo Dallas (subbing for Oliver Grey) on May 8th (NXT)

NOTE: NXT Title reigns only count what has aired on TV, not when changes occur at tapings.

TNA Heavyweight Champion: Bully Ray
– 99 day reign, defeated Jeff Hardy on March 10th (Lockdown PPV)

TNA World Tag Team Champions: James Storm and Gunner
– 15 day reign, defeated former champions Chavo & Hernandez, Aries & Roode, and Bad Influence in a Fatal Four-Way Match on June 2nd (Slammiversary PPV)

TNA X-Division Champion: Chris Sabin
– 15 day reign, defeated former champion Kenny King and Suicide in an Ultimate X Match on June 2nd (Slammiversary PPV)

TNA Television Champion: Abyss
– 15 day reign, defeated Devon on June 2nd (Slammiversary PPV)

TNA Knockouts Champion: Mickie James
– 25 day reign, defeated Velvet Sky on May 23rd Impact

TNA Knockouts Tag Team Champions: ODB and Eric Young
– 466 day reign, defeated Gail Kim and Madison Rayne on March 8th, 2012 (Impact)

De Marco has The Wrestling 5&1.

Stevens has The Pay Window.

Schroeder has WWE RPI Rankings.

Harder has The Professional 3.

Dino has Smart Marks.

Hiotis has The Brain Buster.

The newest After Dark is of the “slow news week” variety, as I wax semi-poetic about Daniel Bryan and compare his current status to that of one Chris Jericho, many years ago. Plus, I run through Payback and have words of advice for Extreme Rising. They won’t listen. They never do.

Also, don’t forget to join the TWNE After Dark Facebook group, for updates on show airtimes and potential discussion topics, and more!

And last week’s Co-op Multiplayer was an all-E3 roundtable, as the forces of the XBOne tried to force me to move away from my pro-Sony position! Fortunately, they were unsuccessful, but the discussion where they try to talk away all of Microsoft’s mistakes is still a great debate! It’s nearly three hours of hot gaming news and blaming Robert for everything (send all hate mail to [email protected]), that you won’t want to miss!

The Last of Us **COMING SOON**
Call of Juarez: Gunslinger **COMING SOON**
Marvel Heroes
Hakuoki: Warriors of the Shinsengumi
Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon
Dragon Fantasy: Book One
Guacamelee!
BioShock Infinite
Dead or Alive 5 Plus
Generation of Chaos 6: Pandora’s Reflection
Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken
Ni No Kuni: Wrath of the White Witch
Earth Defense Force 2017 Portable

411 will have live coverage of Raw tonight starting at 8 pm EDT.

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That’s our show, Marsico is in tomorrow, I will be back next week. Also, don’t forget Co-op Multiplayer this Tuesday at midnight EDT on Spreaker.com, 4PC in the Games Zone on Wednesday, and the TWNE After Dark podcast on Wednesday, airing live at around 9:30 pm EDT on Spreaker.com, posted on 411 shortly thereafter.

Here it is, your Moment of Buddy

Oh, So You’re Feeling Better.
That’s Cool. I’m Totally Not Sitting Over Here
Plotting Your Demise, Or Anything.

Have a good one, and always be a fan.